That’s right. As you read just days ago the zombie plague has spread across America. But now it is being reported that there is another attack at the “ground zero” of the new pandemic. Yesterday, Brandon DeLeon, a North Miami Beach man, walked into a Boston Market and started cursing at two North Miami Beach police officers who were eating at the restaurant.
Once in jail, he growled at officers, banged his head repeatedly on the holding cell, and tried to bite one officers hand. Officers believe he was under the influence of a synthetic drug, such as Bath Salts.
This led officers to post a bulletin warning:
“While
at the holding cell, DeLeon banged his head repeatedly inside the
holding cell. DeLeon growled at officers in the booking area like a rabid dog. DeLeon attempted to bite Officer Ruiz’s hand off…It
was later discovered DeLeon had taken a synthetic drug named Cloud 9.
This bears resemblance to the incident that occurred in the City of
Miami last week when a male ate another man’s face. Please be careful when dealing with our homeless population during your patrols.”
So we know that this Zombie Plague is to be blamed on Bath Salts and Sodomy, but it now seems that the missing third ingredient to create a zombie is homelessness.But what many Americans are asking in this election year is how much does Obama know and when did he know it?
Many of you have read my article “CDC Admits Zombies Are real” making an older article one of the most blessed this week, but for those that have not read the article I will sum it up for you. Over a year ago, the CDC admitted on their website that the Zombie threat existed and should be taken seriously.
Assistant Surgeon General Ali Kha, wrote and posted “Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse” on the CDC website.
“If zombies
did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much
like any other disease outbreak. CDC would provide technical assistance
to cities, states, or international partners dealing with a zombie infestation. This
assistance might include consultation, lab testing and analysis,
patient management and care, tracking of contacts, and infection control
(including isolation and quarantine). It’s likely that an
investigation of this scenario would seek to accomplish several goals:
determine the cause of the illness, the source of the
infection/virus/toxin, learn how it is transmitted and how readily it is
spread, how to break the cycle of transmission and thus prevent further
cases, and how patients can best be treated.”
“…
have an emergency kit in your house. This includes things like water,
food, and other supplies to get you through the first couple of days
before you can locate a zombie-free refugee camp (or in
the event of a natural disaster, it will buy you some time until you
are able to make your way to an evacuation shelter or utility lines are
restored). Other items to be stashed in such a kit include medications,
duct tape, a battery-powered radio, clothes, copies of important
documents and first aid supplies.
Make a list of local contacts like the police, fire department, and your local zombie response team.” And, “Plan your evacuation route. When zombies are hungry they won’t stop until they get food (i.e., brains), which means you need to get out of town fast.”
But what isn’t fortunate is that the Obama Administration had to know about the impending Zombie Apocalypse. Why else warn people about it. Until a week ago we all thought that the undead coming back to dine upon the flesh of the living was fantasy. You don’t see the CDC issuing warnings about Alien Invasions, Sparkling Vampires, or Werewolf attacks.
The fact that we can see now is the CDC knew! They knew that this was going to happen. I will tell you Obama knew as well. He had to, he is the President of the United States (for 6 more months).
The question now, is when did he know and more importantly Why didn’t he tell us? Was Obama afraid of his reelection chances under 10% unemployment and a Zombie Apocalypse. Rest assured that I will not stop until I get to the bottom of this. If Obama put us all at risk then he must not be reelected!
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